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June 2011

Maybe...

Maybe,
I used to think I know you,
I used to think you were my friend...
I used to think I was your friend...

But sadly,
Things changed,
Time passes,
You're not you anymore...

I've always been myself...
Maybe,
You were never yourself?
Or maybe I've never noticed?
Or you have been lying to me?
Maybe even to yourself?

Anger, is what I'm feeling,
It hurts me seeing you this way,
It hurts me seeing me this way,
It hurts me seeing us this way,
But it hurts me the most,
When you don't see me hurting because of us...
It hurts when you are not you anymore,
It hurts when you could care less about this...

Maybe,
You felt the changes in us,
The changes in you...
Steps taken to understand each other was taken,
But never was it printed in your heart,
Steps to listen to one another was taken,
But was blown away by the wind before they could reach to you..
And nothing is on the right track anymore..

You ignore me when I speak,
You ignore me when I listen,
You ignore me when I care,
You pretend to be someone else that I not know,
You pretend to be someone else that you're not,
And the fact that you're getting what you want by pretending,
Is what hurts me the most...
The fact that you're being coy, fake, the person I never know...
And not seeing the consequences of your actions that are affecting us...

You weren't the person now when I first know you,
Maybe you're seeking for attention,
Thinking back about the things you said about attention seeker,
About how you hate them,
And now seeing you changing into one,
Really annoys me and shows me how ironic life can be...

Seeing you everyday,
Makes me feel disgust,
Disgusted about you,
Disgusted about me,
Disgusted about us...
I don't feel the closeness between us anymore,
And I think I'm tired of trying to mend the relationship,
The relationship that seems to be not worthy enough for you,
The relationship that seems you don't mind not having...

I'm tired of trying,
I'm tired of trying and gets shut off whenever I try,
I'm tired to be the only one getting hurt,
I'm tired of your careless attitude...
Maybe it's time for me to let go,
Let go of this relationship we ever had,
Maybe, you should be the one trying...
Maybe, we should just forget about all this...
Forget about the things we had,
And not look at each other the way we used to anymore...

I hate the fact where you take me lightly,
I hate the fact where you're not serious about this,
I hate the fact where you don't try,
I hate the fact where you don't see me trying,
I hate the fact where I don't see you hurting like how I do,
Because of the relationship we have now...

Maybe,
I thought to myself...
Just maybe, it's better for me to not know you in my life,
It's better for you to walk out from my life,
Or maybe I should walk away,
So the shattering of my heart will stop...
And someday, someway, I'll learn to forget...

Maybe...
Just maybe...